For those of you who consider yourselves part of the “Debt Free Community”, do you talk about finances a lot? What about those of you who are struggling and don’t know how to fix it, how much would you say you think about your finances? As you get closer and closer to your financial goals, do you find yourself thinking about them more or less?
At what point does focus become obsession?
At what point is obsession a negative thing?
Is it ever a negative thing?
Grant Cardone is currently promoting his latest book, Be Obsessed or Be Average. Are those the only options? I would rather be obsessed than be average if so, right? Pretty much everyone else I know considers obsession to be going overboard. In fact, my dad told me that obsessing over these details can actually suffocate my ability to receive financial freedom.
“Finances are like relationships. If you hold on too tightly, you’ll suffocate and kill it. Of course you can’t be too loosey goosey though or it will slip away from you. You have to take care and nurture it and it will come back to you”
My lovely and supportive boyfriend has also informed me that while he’s interested in changing his finances, he’s tired of me using him as my financial sounding board.
Here’s the thing though, all the people I follow on Instagram as a part of our #DebtFreeCommunity? Yea, I’ve NEVER seen them tell each other they’re talking about or posting about or even obsessing with their finances too much. And within this community, I have been inspired by family after family after family achieving their goals. Ridding themselves of consumer debts. Saving thousands for the first time in their lives. Saving for a down payment on their first homes. Paying off their mortgages. Providing a debt free lifestyle for their kids. Experiencing financial freedom. Breaking Free.
These are the things I have not yet achieved in my own journey or seen of those around me.
Is this the product of being obsessive? Or is this the product of letting go? Is it only the people on the same path who get it?
Maybe I’m just obsessive.
I find that I do become obsessive with our finances. I obsess over making sure we stick to our plan and see that not one dollar is spent out of place, and if there is, how soon can I put the dollar back and how. Sometimes it’s good to constantly think about it and remind myself what we are working towards. Sometimes I obsess over putting it back into our savings though that then we have to be tighter on things that we shouldn’t go tighter on like food. When we struggled though, I found myself also obsessing but in such an unhealthy way, like constantly talking about my debt and problems to everyone. I realized I did this subconsciously when someone made a joke about me being poor and I was so hurt and offended then thought “I guess I do talk about it a lot and maybe if I didn’t share so much, it wouldn’t be an invitation for others to be so comfortable to talk about MY financial problems so easily.” Currently I don’t talk about my goals with other, I feel like it’s bad karma, I don’t want to sound like I’m bragging but also don’t want to not reach out goals and people think I talked a big talk but couldn’t follow through. Obsessing can go either way.
I think maybe the line is what you’re obsessing over. Is it the problem of “oh we’re struggling”? Or is it the solution of “yay every dollar has a home ad we make sure we keep it there”! Knowing how badass you guys have been with all of this, I feel like without being at least kind of obsessed, you may not have reached this fantastic point with things, you know? Making sure you stick to your plan has only helped push you further along. But maybe it’s a matter of only sharing with people who “get it” you know? Someone who is on that same journey, who is right there with you wouldn’t make jokes like that because they’re in the same spot you know?
Interesting your thoughts on the goals also. Some studies show the fear of not reaching a goal after telling someone actually pushes people harder to make sure they hit it. However I’ve read a lot of science and opinions on both sides of the coin. I end up telling only specific people my goals. The ones who are cheering me on and holding me accountable, not the ones who want to see me fall.
Yeah obsessing isn’t always a bad thing, it’s just knowing when it isn’t good and knowing when and how to stop.
Also, I’ve learned the same, I feel comfortable sharing our goals with like-minded people or those cheering for us, everyone else can mind their own business.